You Never Know What Tomorrow Will Bring

March 15, 2012 at 2:27 AM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | Leave a comment
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This morning I read the blog I posted on 3/14/11.  One year ago today.  I seriously had no clue what was in store the following day.  12 hours later, really.  It was actually about this time of night last year that I started to get a sneaky feeling that something else was about to go awry with my pregnancy and for once I wasn’t happy about being right. 

I will never forget the last night I was pregnant.  I truly was trying to enjoy every second at that point.  I knew that my pregnancy was going to be shorter than the norm.  As I bought more and more time, I cherished it.  Every kick, every movement.  I would ask Kayvan if he saw that…even when he wasn’t looking.  Or if he wanted to feel Kamran moving. 

The night before I had Kamran, I had a tough time getting comfy in my tiny, twin sized hospital bed.  I could typically rely on sleeping comfortably on my right side later in my pregnancy.  Not that night.  Kamran, who always had his feet perched on my right pelvic bone decided that he was unwilling to share.  As I rolled over to sleep, he gave me the kick of a lifetime staking his claim. Like a big baby, I swore that he broke something, rolled to my left side and fell asleep. 

In truth, I liked that kick.  I had noticed that Kam’s kicks had become different.  Stronger.  That night, that kick gave me the confidence I needed to know Kam had grown into a baby strong enough to make it.  Kamran timed his message well, too.

Tomorrow is our amazing little boy’s birthday.  Time really does fly.  I can’t believe how fast he has grown, how well he is doing and what a smart, happy, loving boy he has become in just a year.  He’s been through a ton and has taught me and Kayvan just as much in the process.  Expect a sappy blog after Kam goes to bed tomorrow night too.

And because I haven’t blogged about it much lately, just a reminder that we will be walking in the
March of Dimes, March for Babies in May.  Please walk with us or donate, the March of Dimes was a significant resource for us last year.


Statistical Probablities and Outcomes

February 25, 2012 at 12:31 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | Leave a comment
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I’ve never been good at statistics.  I took AP stats in high school and I got a D.  I have never been a D student.  I was slightly traumatized.  You would think I would learn from that and never take another Stats class my entire life.  Nope.  I told myself that I have an advantage and that the material was still fresh, so I took Stats my very first semester in college and got the same grade.  Now, I did understand a lot of what was lectured in both classes.  I just didn’t test well.  So I understood that the probability of me taking a stats class and having a favorable outcome was slim.  I opted to take a general math class to fulfill my college math requirements…and got an A.

I am not telling you this because I expect you to really care much about my college education or specific classes I took while in college.  I do however expect that you watched “Grey’s Anatomy” this week.  They have shows about preemies pretty regularly.  Not quite as often as before Addison moved over to good ole “Private Practice.”  I never really noticed this, it was all pure entertainment before I went into the hospital.  Now when there is an episode about preemies, Kayvan looks at me and asks if I’m going to be okay.  I typically respond with something to the effect of “Oh, I’m sure I’ll cry.”  I’m usually right.

This week on Grey’s, a mom had to have heart surgery when she was 23 weeks pregnant, which means they had to deliver the baby.  The characters on the show were were both residents at different hospitals and different states.  When the dad showed up with his statistical calculator I didn’t want to cry.  I got angry.  Really angry.  I hated those stupid statistics when my water broke.  I mean, who likes to be told that their child might have a 50% chance of survival.  NOT ME.  I’m willing to bet, not anyone.  The ridiculous part is, I understand why doctors rely on statistics.  It gives them the general idea about a select audience that they can then apply to a larger subset.  Fine. 

There are also outliers.  That’s what I was banking on my entire pregnancy.  I’m not even sure I shared the 50% stat until Kam was born.  I didn’t need others around me focusing on it.  Of course, as I got further along, the stats got even better.  Then I liked them. 

When I watched Grey’s this week I wanted to reach through the TV screen and hug the preemie mom, Morgan when she gave baby daddy the boot.  When you are fighting adversity, you don’t need crap weighing you down.  Rally around positivity, be happy and optimistic.  That is usually not an easy thing at all in a hard situation.  It is absolutely okay to have days or moments where you are angry, or cry, or even throw cell phones across the room only to have nurse grab it before you can.  (That may or may not have happened to me.)  In my opinion, to be angry is to take the path of least resistance. To be optimistic is the harder road, the fighter’s road, the one of the person with hope ignoring the stupid statistics and seeking a positive outcome despite the odds weighing against them.

Spit Up vs. Vomit

February 11, 2012 at 12:44 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | 1 Comment
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At what point do you no longer call it spit up? Kamran will officially be 11 months next week. With reflux, I was told it gets better once they are sitting, eating solids, walking and/or crawling. Not my kid. I’m pretty sure Kamran spit up his entire bottle last night. At one point, he was pushing his little walking toy, spit up, and kept going.

I hate it. Sookie, that gross girl still loves her predigested dessert (it’s okay to gag, I just did thinking about it). I even had to change my clothes before I went to bed last night because I had so much spit up on me. I stunk! Not to mention, Kamran spit up on our bed so I had to change the sheets.

The amount of spit up at one time is insane too! His stomach is bigger, therefore he spits up more than when he was an itty bitty.

Okay, really I’m ranting. He is probably teething. When he starts walking I get to call it puke. Fair?

Kamran Can…

January 28, 2012 at 3:32 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | Leave a comment
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It’s been a while since I updated about what Kamran has learned to do. So here it goes.

At 10.5 months old:

Kam crawls really well. He can get anyone or anything so long as it doesn’t involve stairs. He also likes to carry toys in his hand as he crawls around.

He pulls up on any and everything. His crib, the baby gates…me.

He does not stand unassisted yet, but we are getting there.

He holds onto our fingers and walks really well, and cruises the furniture.

He says ma and da, still just for the sake of baby babble. He says “doh” for dog sometimes but only Kayvan or I would understand, we are pretty sure he’s working on red which is just “reh” and on occasion he will say “mo” when he signs more.

So for signing, he signs “fan,” “more,” “dog,” (for both the cat and dog) sometimes he confuses it with what looks like “please.” The other day he signed “light” and “all done.” He confuses “more” for a universal “I need something” at times. Sometimes it means “all done” which is confusing on the mommy front. We are working on “banana,” “kitty” and daycare is working on “thank you.” I’m also trying to show him the difference between “dog” and “please” as well as “more” and “all done” now that he has learned it. I honestly didn’t expect anyone in this house to take to signing so well and am proud of this boy and how far he has come.

Dads and Diapers

January 22, 2012 at 9:46 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | 3 Comments
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Let me start this blog by saying that I have such an amazing husband who is the most hands on dad he could possibly be. For that I am incredibly thankful. I am also thankful for the hysterical diaper dad moments I have witnessed the past ten months. This mornings event made me laugh so hard I just had to share. I only wish I had a picture.

I had just gotten out of the shower and was getting ready in our master bath. Kayvan said he was going to change Kamran and I could hear Kayvan put him on our bed. The only way to ensure a scream free diaper change these days. Kayvan pointed out the fan to Kamran and the world sounded happy. Shortly after Kayvan started to change Kamran’s diaper I heard a bit of a commotion which meant one thing. Kamran had tried to roll over and Kayvan flipped him back to his back causing Kamran to scream. After a few “look fan!” and “do you want to play with this?!” comments from Kayvan I got a very urgent “I NEED HELP OUT HERE!!” from Kayvan. There was no thud. I knew they were both physically unharmed but quickly opened the bathroom door only to burst out in laughter at the scene in front of me.

Now let’s see if I can paint this picture with words…

Kayvan was holding Kamran up in the air almost like you would an infant in football hold. His hand was supporting Kamran’s chest and Kayvan was holding Kamran’s ankles as Kamran still attempted to crawl away mid air…poopy butt up.

As soon as I opened the door, prepared to rescue, Kayvan said “Just wipe the poop!” in a defeated tone. I could not stop laughing. I’m giggling now as I think back to this morning. Kayvan has had these moments before. Several of them. But he hasn’t had one in at least a few months.

This may only be funny to me, I’m aware that I take that risk with this post.

I love my boys!

2011: A Year in Review

December 31, 2011 at 10:00 AM | Posted in Baby Romaezi, Crochet | Leave a comment
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Our year in review is pretty simple for 2011.  Looking back, we only had one big, exciting focus this year.  This is of course in comparison to years past which were filled with trips, evenings out and new hobbies.  If our focuses hadn’t shifted I might be a little worried.  Here is how 2011 looks in text:

January – March:  Hospital life which consisted of video games for Kayvan and lots of hat making for me.  Kamran was born 3/15 and spent a month in the NICU.

April:  Kamran came home from the NICU 4/17, 2 days before his due date.

May:  We enjoyed our little boy and all of the sleepless nights he brought us courtesy of reflux.

June:  Kamran’s first surgery (and hopefully last).

July:  Jamie went back to work.

August – December:  These last few months flew by and were filled with Kamran’s first Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I think the visual year in is much more fun.  HATS!  I made Kamran a hat a month.  Some fit themes, some were just cute.  We will kick it off with March in a hat I did not make but considering this is the first time Kamran got to wear clothes, it’s pretty special to me.  He has grown so much!

Kayvan, Kamran and I hope you all have an amazing New Year!  Party safe tonight.

First Christmas

December 30, 2011 at 8:30 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | Leave a comment
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I’m absolutely loving all of these firsts.  Christmas is so much better when you have a kid! 

Kamran isn’t to the point where he gets excited about Christmas, or even understanding what Christmas is.  I look forward to the day where we get to re-live Christmas through his eyes.  I can’t wait to make Cookies for Santa, or partake in the whole elf on a shelf trend, or making a Christmas wish list with him, I most especially cannot wait for his anticipation of Christmas morning and his inability to wait for a decent hour to roll around to run downstairs, see what Santa brought him and open gifts.

This year was the first year Kayvan and I woke up in our own house on Christmas morning.  Last year was supposed to be our first for that but it had to wait just a bit.  It was amazing to wake up, cook breakfast and simply wait for people to come to us.  We got to sleep in our own beds and didn’t have to worry about racing around the beltway between various family member’s homes.  They came to us!  I stayed in my pajamas all day long and it was pure bliss!

Kamran made out like a 9 month old bandit.  All of the gifts put him into sensory overload and he even had to nap in the middle of opening presents.  It was so fun to watch him play with his new toys and even establish favorites. Since his recent obsession is standing up, I think the current favorite is his new little play table.  Laugh and Learn Puppy captivates him pretty well too.

Happy Not Birthday!

December 29, 2011 at 9:43 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | 2 Comments
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This post is coming a bit late.  Rather than apologize for that, I’ll just accept late blog posts as a standard these days and roll with it.

When the clock struck December 1st, I was overwhelmed with anxiety about the 1 year anniversary of being admitted to the hospital.  I’m sure it sounds slightly silly but Kayvan and I experienced a lot that day. I’ve spent most of the year pushing it all to the back of my mind, but as the day approached on the calendar, I found that task more and more impossible.  As we were experiencing everything that day last year, I felt as if I was doing everything with beer goggles on.  Slightly numb, slightly in shock and most certainly feeling like absolute crap.  This is all thanks to magnesium, of course.  I lived it, I had the conversations and it was all very real then but when I jump back into the memory now, sans magnesium (and beer goggles), the fear we lived is still pretty fresh, only now without the protection of being slightly in shock and with the added ability and time to over think.

Kayvan and I really have nothing to fear anymore.  The fear is gone but I’m still processing the whole experience.  I had to almost go into auto pilot to get through the hospital experience and well, auto pilot is no longer turned on and I’m free to over think.  I wanted to celebrate Kamran, our special little man.  So, I decided that we would embrace the day and dubbed 12/23 Kamran’s “not birthday”. 

Mr. Kamran woke up in a fantastic mood, and waved at me repetitively like he does to everything and everyone these days.


As with anything worth celebrating, Kamran got a not birthday present too!  I was so excited to give it to him because this would be the very first present he ever unwrapped.  He loved it!  Especially the part where he got to unwrap the present with his teeth.  Oh babies and their sensory processing ways!



Throughout the day I received lots of love.  This was oh so unexpected.  The day started out from an e-mail from a fellow former bed rest momma who lives in Canada.  It was so sweet, unexpected and both brought a smile to my face and tears to my eyes.  She totally gets everything I experienced because she went through something similar.  Later I got an e-mail from one of the L&D nurses who worked the sucky Christmas hours it took to make sure I stayed pregnant and didn’t have myself a Christmas baby.  Little did we know that she would be a fellow bed rest momma a few weeks later, so she gets it too.  A bit later in the day I answered a knock at the door, expecting it to be the contractor who was scheduled to work on our deck.  It was a man armed with flowers from the aforementioned former bed rest friend.  I was so surprised that it took all I had not to cry in front of this man.  I’m sure that would have made him really uncomfortable. Kamran’s twin-friends did a quick drive by later in the day with another not birthday present for him.  He absolutely loved their gift and part of hit has turned into one of his favorite things to crawl around with.  The blue cylinder from the shapes in a bucket toy (not sure how else to describe it).  A huge thank you to everyone who called, texted, stopped by with gifts, mailed surprises (or flowers) and sent e-mails.  It really meant a lot to me and made me feel a little less crazy for being slightly emotional that day.

No not birthday would be complete without a visit to the hospital to share goodies!  We took Kamran by to show him off and say hi to our nurses.  He LOVED all of the attention he got and absolutely hammed it up complete with big smiles to thank the ladies who got to listen to him every 4 hours. 

All in all, 12/23/2011 was amazing and leaps and bounds better than 12/23/2010.

Fricking Baby Gate!!!

December 3, 2011 at 12:46 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi, Sookie the French Bulldog | Leave a comment
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When we got Sookie, we bought this cheap, ugly, worthless piece of a baby gate. You get what you pay for. It was like $15 on amazon. Neither Kayvan nor I could figure out how to work the tension part and make it work appropriately. So we opted to use the lean function. I tripped over this stupid thing when I was first pregnant and at that time Sookie was good enough with the whole asking to potty thing so the gate was banished to the garage.

Fast forward to a month ago. Our cat got a UTI and started peeing everywhere but his litter box and our kid started getting more mobile. Bad combo and kitty had to be kept segregated for a bit. Welcome back stupid fricking baby gate. Only this time, Kayvan insisted on leaning it at the bottom of the stairs.

Every morning, I would walk down the stairs to find that stinking gate sitting there mocking me. I had to pick it up and move it before I could go anywhere. Sookie also wouldn’t go down the steps with it there.

Finally I complained enough for Kayvan to tell me to order new gates for the house. Not that I needed his permission as much as I needed him to say he would install them. So, order new gates I did…on a Friday, and received them the very next day…a Saturday. Thank you for $4 overnight delivery, Amazon!

The new gates are black and shiney and mount to the walls. They are too tall for me to climb over. But then, why would I? They have a hinge.

Oh, and Sookie doesn’t exactly love being contained. This is her…cussing me out.


First Thanksgiving

November 25, 2011 at 12:22 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | 1 Comment
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This time last year, we announced to the family over dinner that we finally knew the gender and we were having a boy! Insane how it feels like just yesterday. Everyone knew that we found out the gender of the baby. And they were completely frustrated that Kayvan and I just would not spill the beans. It is how we told family and their reaction that makes me giggle.  I’ll get to this year, I promise but first, this story.

Kayvan and I hosted Thanksgiving last year. I tasked him with setting the table. A task which included hiding an ultrasound picture. When dinner was ready, everyone sat down to eat. They filled their plates and as the hungry group started taking their first bites, kayvan asked if they would like to know the gender of the baby. We got a certain “yes” from the entire table. Then Kayvan told them that the answer was hidden in or around the table and they had to find it.

We actually thought that our hungry guests would continue eating and look for the answer later with dessert. We were wrong. Of the 18 people at dinner, my mom, Kayvan’s mom and Kayvan’s uncle were the most eager. My mom jumped up, started looking and before I knew it was crawling on the floor in her dress. Kayvan’s mom was looking everywhere. Under the tablecloth, seats, you name it. Kayvan’s uncle was sitting across from me and scoured every inch of the table within his reach. I had no idea where the picture actually was hidden, so I couldn’t help. Eventually, Kayvan started giving cues. I kept eating because let’s face it, I was pregnant and just got my appetite back. It was Kayvan’s uncle who found the photo first, but before he could read it, my mom ran over and snatched the photo from the man she had only just met. She ran into the kitchen followed by Kayvan’s mother and stretched her arms out until the photo was visible to her. She shouted, “it’s a boy.” and hugged Kayvan’s mom as if they indeed were the ones who were going to have a baby. A comedy scene, really.

This year was much different. We picked up our friend Chris as we do every Thanksgiving and lugged the pack n play and portable high chair to Kayvan’s uncle’s house where his family was visiting from out of town. Everyone just loved seeing Kamran and got a kick out of his outfit, complete with a vest and bow tie. He was fully spoiled and got lots of hold time. Kayvan loved watching his uncle feed Kamran his solids at lunch time. Later in the night, we all laughed as one of his cousins fed Kam his dinner solids as well. he did a good job, it was more Kayvan’s pride–and heckling that was funny. Both Kayvan’s cousin and his uncle asked the same question, how much does he eat?” I’m not sure why I found this funny. I had handed them each a 2 oz portion of homemade baby food but they asked like it was an entire turkey leg. everyone had fun feeding the baby. Even me. We planned it out so that Kamran could try turkey for the first time on Thanksgiving. Now that he is 8 months the pediatrician says we can start meat. I decided that puréed turkey would be gross and instead broke it into the smallest bites then shared it with Kamran. He always makes a funny face upon first bite and that he did. Not only did he continue to make this face, but he spit the turkey out. This photo sums up his disdain pretty well.  Check out more photos from Thanksgiving here:


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