Adjusting To Life In the NICU

March 21, 2011 at 12:08 PM | Posted in Baby Romaezi | 4 Comments
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As one might imagine, this week has been full of new challenges, lessons, discoveries and adjustments. Kamran is still in the NICU and I came home two nights ago. The best way to describe the first night home for me is… overstimulating. My house was such a foreign place to me. So different from when I left it. The Christmas tree was down, the house was spotless. Wrapping paper was nowhere to be found. I sat on my couch and didn’t quite know what to do. All I wanted was to be sitting with my baby in my arms and I couldn’t do that. It actually wasn’t hard leaving the hospital without him. It was hard coming home without him. Really hard.

The first night absolutely sucked. I should have been happy to have been home for the first time in 3 months…but I wasn’t. Not one bit. It only got worse when I tried to get into our bed and couldn’t. I couldn’t lay flat. Damn surgery. Frustrated by so many different things, I could only cry–uncontrollably. Relinquishing my life to the hospital was pretty darn easy in comparison to that first night home. I ended up sleeping in the baby’s oversized rocker recliner. Kayvan crawled in with me and went to sleep too. I know he was sad but he held it together and really was there for me, the inconsolable new mom. My milk has come in so I’m pumping every few hours. I sent him back to bed when I woke up so he could actually sleep comfortably.

Onto the important stuff. Kamran is improving very quickly. Of course, there is an occasional set back every now and then but those are to be expected. The first night he needed oxygen and was on lipids to feed. He was maintaining his temperature and really wasn’t connected to much. The second night, he was much more attached. He was being treated for jaundice and had to be put into an incubator. He also started having trouble maintaining temperature and was being treated for that. He came off of the oxygen quickly buy had to go back on 12 hours later. They also got the results got the and there were no problems so they fed 8 ccs of breast milk trough a tube.

He now does very well with the bottle and can handle his food well. He is flying and was up to 25 ccs yesterday. I imagine he will be taken to a full 30 cc feed today. I am also allowed to breastfeed once a day and he does SO well with it. The first time he breast fed I couldn’t get my shirt out of his way fast enough. He latched perfectly the first time. My boy likes his food. That may be the one thing (in addition to my bad veins) that he got from me. He also got pretty pissed that his feeding tube got in the way of putting his thumb in his mouth and ripped that out the other night. He’s doing so well with food that the doctors kept it out.

He also came off of oxygen yesterday and did well overnight. Fingers crossed he is able to stay off of it. He has been off of the bili lights for jaundice for a day and a half but will probably have to go back on today.

The nurses have been so amazing. We already have a favorite. Kayvan just stopped seeing infants as breakable a few years ago but Kam is do small that Kayvan gets a little cautious around him. The big fear, which I understand is pulling on the pic line. Our boy has so many attachments right now. It can also be tough to know how to get a preemie to start sucking and swallowing when they fall asleep eating so the nurses have taught us how to remind him. Last night the bottle was in his mouth but he screamed and screamed like it was taken from him. Our nurse taught Kayvan how to press the bottle on Kamrans tongue to remind him that the bottle is indeed there and he has nothing to cry about. That was one of the first times we have seen him cry so Kayvan kept smiling at the silly screaming infant in his arms. Being the oldest child, I have been around lots of infants but never a preemie. I’m learning lots about why babies do things. The preemie way…we will get the hang of it soon. But before you know it he will be walking around our house and we will miss the days when he was 4 lbs 12 oz.

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  1. So glad to hear little Kam is doing well. I’ve been thinking about you daily. I too had to leave my first two babies at the hospital after they were born, due to severe jaundice, and understand how that feels. There’s really nothing I can say that will make you feel better about it, you already know he’s safe and in good hands. Hang in there momma, big hugs from California.

    • Thanks Kelly. One thing that comforts me is knowing that I’m not alone and that the outrageous roller coaster of emotions I’m on is completely normal. There are so many sick babies in there and we are lucky Kamran is healthy but just has a few things to learn first.

  2. I spent most of the weekend reading through your blog and I’m absolutely amazed and the strength that you and Kayvan have shown throughout this whole process. Kamran is lucky to have amazing parents like you and he will, most definitely, realize that one day. Keep your head up, Jamie.

    We acquire the strength we have overcome. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

    • Thank you Sam. We’ve learned a lot the past few months. I love that quote. I can say with absolute certainty that this journey has strengthened the relationship between Kayvan and I a ton.

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